Opting To Opt Out

Tuesday 6 June 2017

We choose to opt out son out of First Communion and it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I have nothing against people’s individual beliefs but I absolutely detest the Church - State connection that continues to pervade all areas of Irish life, limiting choice across many areas, particularly in healthcare and education.  I respect people who attend Mass and practice their faith but I simply cannot support the blind following of religious sacraments and traditions just for the sake of it, for a day out or because people think it doesn’t do any harm.  I cannot support my children taking part in a Church that purported to care, while causing such tremendous pain and suffering in the lives of the most vulnerable. A Church that ruled with fear and shame. A Church that subjugated women and children while protecting the perpetrators of heinous crimes. A Church that continues to teach that sex before marriage is wrong, that contraception is wrong, that being gay is wrong, that priest’s marrying is wrong. 

My first child was born before we were married. To indoctrinate him and have him somehow support a ridiculous, antiquated notion that his parents did something sinful in his conception by having him stand in a church and rhyme off words that he can barely understand, let alone find meaning in – well no, that was never going to happen.  I appreciate that the Catholic Church, like any religion, is more than an institution.  It is more than faith and spirituality.  It is also the rituals, which have formed a huge part of our culture and society, particularly here in Ireland.  I also appreciate that like any institution it is comprised of individuals, many of whom have done remarkable work and given tirelessly and most generously to their communities.  But that cannot negate the facts of our history.  It cannot absolve the sins of closed ranks and it cannot ignore that society has evolved and that there is no longer room for one dominant religion across all areas of Irish life. 

And yet our politicians, apparently totally oblivious to our modern multicultural society recently voted to uphold prayers at the beginning of official Government business, in a State building.  It is now compulsory to stand for Dáil prayers, and for non-religious members of the Dáil to observe a “moments silence”.  I can’t imagine a scenario whereby an employer would require me to stand for a prayer before starting my day’s work.  In fact, I’m pretty sure it could be viewed as exclusionary and surely in breach of some employment law or another.  And yet our Government are praying to one God, a Catholic God.  Our school children are praying to that same Catholic God and I can’t help but wonder how many people would be praying if that decision was removed from our schools.  If the onus was put on parents to enrol in after school or weekend faith classes, instead of paying our educators to hold the mantle, then I really do wonder just how many 8 year olds would be lined up at the altar.